The Whole Tooth

My dearest Molly,

I had hoped -- prayed, in fact -- that you and I would never have to have that conversation.  But, unfortunately, we've had to have it already... a lot sooner than I ever dreamt.

I'm talking about your teeth, of course.  (What else would I be referring to???)

There's a genetic quirk in my family - a weird dominant gene somewhere in the chain... that causes some of us to be born without enamel on our teeth.  It's called amelogenesis imperfecta.  It's incredibly rare.  My childhood dentist told me it's one paragraph in one book in all of dental school -- he was told "You'll never see this... but here's what it is."  It's not a huge deal -- and luckily it doesn't seriously affect our health in any way.  But, unfortunately, teeth without enamel are yellow in color... so it's a quirk that's hard to hide.

While I was pregnant with you, I had prayed and prayed that you'd have a beautiful, normal smile.  But, deep down I knew that there could be many, MANY other conditions you could be born with that would cause many more serious health problems... and I tried to keep that in mind.  (I've had too many friends who've had babies with serious health problems - and that gave me the a new perspective on discolored teeth.)  I also knew it was something I couldn't control -- it's a roll of the genetic dice -- so I tried not to worry about it.

Your first teeth didn't pop through until you were a year old.  (Really late.)  And at first, they looked white.  I was so relieved, I cried.  We took you to the pediatric dentist as soon as you had teeth and I explained my history.  He didn't see anything to concern him - but encouraged us to bring you back regularly.

When you were two, you decided to run with a truck in your daycare class... then you fell and cracked your front tooth.  So I had the pleasure of rushing you to the dentist for emergency x-rays.  Dr. Mark wasn't so concerned about the crack (luckily, besides a chip out of your front tooth, there wasn't any serious damage), but he did mention he was concerned about your enamel... it seemed to be wearing off.  I took you to my hometown dentist for a second opinion... and he looked at me and said, "Vic, she's got it."  And I cried again.

Luckily, your case isn't nearly as drastic-looking as mine or my brother's... your teeth are a much milder, softer yellow so it's not immediately noticeable.  So we didn't worry too much about it.  (In fact, most people don't really notice it unless we say something.)

But then a girl at your daycare said something to you -- "Your teeth are yellow."  And my heart broke.

Before you started Kindergarten, I sent an email to your teacher explaining the situation.  She was so kind and replied that if any kids commented that she'd use it as a learning experience for the whole class about what makes each of us different.

So far, so good.  But there was a kid in aftercare the other day who said to you "Your teeth are yellow."  You told Daddy about it but wouldn't tell me.  We talked about it some -- and we've explained to you that some people are born that way.  Some people have freckles and some people are tall... and some people have teeth without enamel.  That's just the way some people are.

So, I'm sorry that you'll get asked all too many times, "Don't you brush your teeth?  Then why are they yellow?"  I'm sorry that, when you talk about smoking in Health class and the teacher reads that one of the side affects is yellow teeth, the ENTIRE class will turn and stare at you.  There will be days when it's hard to be that kid who's different... and there will be plenty of kids who will be cruel to you.  But, if they weren't mean to you about your teeth, they would find something else to tease you about.  (Unfortunately, that's just the way it is with some kids.  You'll realize later that they are teasing you to cover up their own insecurities... but it's hard to realize that when you're five... or 10... or 16...)  And I'm sorry that you're going to spend a LOT of quality time in a dentist chair.

But your teeth are one of those things that makes you you -- and makes you who you'll be.  And I am so very thankful that this is the toughest thing in your life -- when there are so many things (health-related and otherwise) that are so much worse.  And you'll realize later that everyone has something she's embarrassed about... whether it's being too tall, too short, not cool enough... or having a serious health problem, or a family problem that can't be fixed.

And this is one very unique thing that we share... and I hope you know that you can ALWAYS talk to me about this.

Love you, peanut.
One very sweet and kind sidebar to this whole story:  there's a lovely photographer who does all the holiday photos at your daycare and all the sports photos for the local teams.  Daddy was talking to her at the Halloween Spooktacular and introduced himself as Molly's Dad.  The photographer said, "Oh, I always remember Molly because I touch up her teeth.  I hope you don't mind.  She has such a pretty smile."  That made me cry, because that was so sweet and thoughtful of her to do.

Thoughtfulness

Molly,

It's amazing the things you do or think of that are completely unprompted by Daddy or me... like learning all the words to "Defying Gravity" from Glee in like two days, or separating the recycling from the trash when you throw stuff away.

Today, it was creating a card for your soccer coach.

You've always been thoughtful when it comes to cards, like the time you wanted to create a get well card for Jade the elephant.  (That still gets me.)  So when you said you wanted to make a card for Coach John, I didn't think much of it.  You dictated to me all you wanted to say, then you went off to finish it.

Here's what you came up with:

Yes, that's a picture of the whole team (or as many of them as can fit on one page) with Coach John in his signature red baseball hat.  ("He always wears a red hat," Molly informed me.)  I was just amazed and touched that that was the picture in your head of your soccer coach and team that you wanted to share.

Awesome.

(By the way, Coach John thought the card was very sweet.  He loved your drawing and was amazed that you came up with that all by yourself.)

Love you, peanut.

Soccer Girls

Isabella, Molly, and Ellie -- opponents on the soccer field, but friends always

Molly as goalie - with a little help from Coach John

Writing Notes

Molly,

One of the best things about you learning to write at school is now you leave notes for Daddy and me around the house.  Notes like this...

Love the phonetic spelling on "family."  And hearts dotting the i's in my name?  Love it!

Or this one...

Worth A Thousand Words...

Molly -

Your daddy and I have a tradition:  Every five years, like clockwork, we get our photos taken with a real photographer.  First, it was our engagement and wedding photos... then, five years later, we had our first family photos done... with you in my belly. 

Fastforward five years... so it's time for a real photo session again. 

Don't get me wrong - we've had plenty of family photos taken since you were born... mostly at Picture People or Kiddie Kandids.  They've been great.  But there's something about a real photo shoot with a REAL photographer that I love.  The pictures are always so great.  I'm a sucker for good photography. 

(I just realized that this is a Molly Paige first -- your first real photo shoot!)

At the Trivia Night for your preschool, I bid on a session with a photographer.  I put $35 -- the starting price... and I won!  I was geeked.  That was back in March.  We finally got it scheduled for October (thinking the fall colors would be great) but we were rained out once and the photographer had to cancel on us another time due to a family emergency.

We rescheduled for Saturday and crossed our fingers.  Being early November, the weather was going to be iffy at best.

It was GORGEOUS.  In fact, at 75 degrees, it was warmer and more beautiful than the two dates we tried in October.

We had a blast.  The photographer, Rochelle, was really sweet and loved what a willing model you were.  Funny - turns out that Rochelle is from Goshen - the town next to my hometown!  Small world...

I can't wait to see how Rochelle's photos turned out... because the few I was able to snap just melt my heart...

Seriously?  An elephant at the place Rochelle picked for us to take photos?  Could it be any more perfect for Molly?

Goofing around with Rochelle...

It takes a real man to hold pink balloons...

This next one takes my breath away...

Day in the Life - Halloween

I had such fun putting together my first "day in the life" blog post (where I took photos every hour on the hour all day long) that I thought I'd attempt it again on Halloween -- especially since Halloween was on a Saturday and we'd be visiting Grandma and Papa and celebrating Missouri State's Homecoming along with our friends the Wests.

Here goes:  Day in the Life - Halloween Edition...

7:15 a.m. -- Still zonked out with Humphrey and Dottie.













7:45 a.m. - Working in a little coloring with Grandma before heading out for the day.  (Amazing the difference 30 minutes can make!)

8 a.m. - Molly and Humphrey ordering bagels at Panera.

8:45 a.m. - Our impromptu breakfast picnic before the parade starts.

9 a.m. - TIME FOR THE MISSOURI STATE HOMECOMING PARADE!  WOO HOO!!!  (As Molly noted, this was her first official parade - another MPB First!)

9:45 a.m. - Molly pretending to be a big sister to poor Lily.

10 a.m. - Still parading...

10:30 a.m. -- You know how after you went and saw "Stomp" for the first time, you left the theater wanting to hit trash can lids and everything in sight?  I guess the parade had the same affect on Molly and Ellie...

11 a.m. - GO BEARS!  GRRRRRR.......

11:30 a.m. - Goofing around in the bowling alley at the student union...

12 noon - Off with Grandma for some fun while Mommy and Daddy go to the football game.

Fast forward to 6 p.m.  Time to get down to business -- time for trick or treating!  We went to Ellie and Lily's Grandma and Grandpa's house and had a blast.

(My favorite photo of the night...)

8 p.m. - One of the last stops of the night:  to see Daddy's Grandma Helen

9 p.m. - Home to Grandma...

Another great day in the life...

Bursting with Pride

File this in the category of "Bragging Mommy Blogs"

Molly,

I had your first official parent/teacher conference earlier tonight with Mrs. C.  We've had conferences before with you day care and preschool teachers, but this one seemed really official.  Unfortunately, Daddy was out of town so he wasn't able to join me.

I had a feeling Mrs. C. would say mostly good things.  But I was overwhelmed at how special she thinks you are.  Here's a quick rundown of what she said:

- "Oh, Molly.  She's such a doll."

-  "Any teacher would be thrilled to have Molly in their class."

- "Molly is very popular."

-  "Molly is very mature - one of the most mature in the class.  In fact, when she told me her birthday, I didn't think it could be right!"

- "She's ver confident and a hard worker during independent time."

- "Molly is great at helping others and very compassionate to her classmates."

- "She follows classroom and school rules."

- "She's a good listener to both teachers and classmates."

Yes, we did talk about things you need to work on -- basically slowing down and taking time on your work.  But overall, you're a great student and classmate.  (Now, if only you'd always be so good at home for Daddy and me...)

Proud of you, Molly!